Race

  Does America have a race problem?  I don't think so.  I think its a problem created by main stream media and media hogs like Al Sharpton.  I grew up on Air Force bases, base housing to be exact and it was a mixing bowl of all different races and religions who happened to have a parent or parents in the Air Force.    I came very close to dating a black man before I discovered much to my amazement that my Dad was not very keen on that idea, I did date a Vietnamese Marine, that griped him worse, but in that case he happened to be right and it had nothing to do with race and everything to do with him being a Marine.
   Are the police more brutal?  I have a thought,if you don't want to be in a bad situation with police don't commit crimes.  None of these recent incidents were with innocent people, every last one of them had a rap sheet, committed a crime or made the bad decision to run, or in the case of Travon tried to attack a guy who was protecting his neighborhood and was armed to protect himself.  In each of these cases parents lost a child, it is horrible, it is sad, no parent should have to bury their child.  Parents should teach their child if the police ever stop you for anything, do exactly what you are told immediately, if you are innocent, sort it out at the station or in court if necessary.  The police have a tough job, they want to go home at night, they don't want to shoot anybody.  The guilt of that is enormous.  The knowledge of killing someone's child is horrible.  It's even more horrible if that person was unarmed, but understand a big guy coming at you is armed with considerable size and can hurt you.  Tasering doesn't always work especially if that person is high.  You have a split second decision to make to insure you go home to your loved ones and nobody else gets hurt.  The only case right now that is in question is what happened to Freddie Gray!  Suppose the police gave him a rough ride unrestrained and because of his recent injuries he was gravely injured and died.  The police are in the wrong if that is what happened.  That is no reason to burn, loot, and destroy your community, that does nothing.  Dr. King would roll over in his grave.  he preached non- violence.  It accomplishes nothing to try and harm the police.  Be the change, be a positive change.  It is not a race issue, it is people who felt entitled to act like thugs!  They do it every time, we have come to expect it.  Why?  It is not a race issue it is in the words of a black preacher a sin issue.  They have helped nobody, they have not even started a decent conversation.  They act like thugs and destroy their communities and hurt people and Al Sharpton and the media descend like vultures to prey.  It sells, destruction sells, that is sad.  There will be a next time, we don't even hear of other cases involving people who aren't black, we don't hear of black on black violence, we don't hear when blacks attack whites, or even when Muslims attack anybody because it doesn't sell like a police officer injuring or killing a black person.  We made it a racial issue, our President sends delegates to these funerals but true patriots and heroes get nothing.  A former head of State, Margaret Thatcher dies and our country does nothing, we look horrible as a nation for that. Our priorities are messed up, it is high time we stood up and said this has got to stop.  Instruct our young people how to behave.  A woman just showed us sometimes how to do that, maybe you don't have to slap your child in public, but he understands that Mama didn't raise him to be a thug and I don't see him as being a victim he has a mama who loves her baby and will do whatever it takes.  As a nation we need to make sure that there is never another Ferguson, or Baltimore, or New York, ever again it takes education and understanding and an old fashioned thing called compassion for your fellow man.

Marriage

  I have been married for almost 26 years.  Every year has not always been rainbows and roses, I am human and I have a temper.  The man I married loves me, I love him.  Recently we saw friends decide to go their separate ways, it was sad.  It is not the first time that we have watched seemingly wonderful compatible people just decide they don't want to be together anymore.  Marriage is hard sometimes, the things that were cute or mildly annoying in the beginning seem to become almost unbearable.  I don't understand what happens when it all falls apart.  I have had fights with my beloved, there have been times when I didn't love him, I didn't  like him, but emotions lie!  The next day when everything is calm I look at that man who is my everything and my best friend and just can't imagine life without him.  He is my best friend, always has been.  I love running errands if it means I get to spend time with him.  I know that the world we live in is no Utopia, there is people who think nothing of flirting with a married person.  They are very disturbed people in my opinion why would you want to be with someone who has so little regard for your bond to your spouse.
  Sex is hard sometimes, you have children, jobs, errands, and stuff and sometimes health issues and sex feels like one more thing on your to do list that you have no interest in.  My hubby and I have always been on two different time clocks.  He is a morning lark, I am unbearable until my 1st cup of coffee.  I  come to life in the afternoon or evening when he is winding down and is tired.  We have 2 biological children and a great sex life so obviously we make it work.  So why am I writing all this down, I just want people to be real.  When you are young and newlywed you are so in love that you think nothing will ever change and then it does.  Life is a series of hills and valleys, it just is.  When you are in a valley you can't see the top.  You think you will always feel that way but you don't.  You will always face challenges and you have to choose to stay and fight and work or leave.  Let me say right here if he/she is abusive leave!  That never ever gets better, it always gets worse.  So you are going along and if your blessed children come along and life gets BUSY!  You are always tired, or so it seems and we have been there too.  We made a point to date.  MANY times it was a movie and food in front of a t.v.  We could not afford a sitter.  It is so important.  Those kids grow up and they leave and then what do you want to look at a person you have disconnected from while you were a parent and discover you have nothing in common anymore.  Dating is important, sex is critical, when you are tired, when you don't feel like it.  Men are sensitive like this they need to be touched, held, cuddled or whatever.  Women think well "hell I have worked, nursed, I am tired, I don't feel attractive, I have a headache, and we'll get around to it later when life is less busy," it never happens.  I have been there.  I don't want someone else to see what I have and decide that since I don't want him/her they  will.    This is my advice, never take him/her for granted.  You are together for a reason.  We all get old, we all face challenges, nobody really wants to do life alone, it is no fun.  If you are married and feeling that disconnect, if the grass looks greener over there, maybe you didn't do what you thought you would do with your life and you want it before life is over and you didn't.  Look at that spouse of yours, go on a date, like you did in the beginning, talk. review your hopes and dreams for the future.  You don't need Victoria and her secrets, you need a heart and some time.  To my beloved you are just as sexy, just as fun, just as sweet and caring as you were all those years ago.  I love you to the moon and back and then some.